Ok, imagine for a moment a good looking guy who is dressed sharp; Good shoes, fitted suit, nice shirt. He approaches an attractive girl on her lunch break in a coffee shop... She's ahead in the line to pay and he notices her grab a chocolate muffin off the shelf, she looks back over her shoulder and our guy "James" heart skips a beat... over the course of the next 20 seconds he starts wondering to himself if he should introduce himself to this hot woman, what he should say? He knows being cocky and funny works so he waits untill she's at the counter ready to pay and nervously blurts out "A moment on the lips, a life time on the hips..." She gives him an awkward look and speeds up out of the coffee shop. James stands there embarassed and the negative self talk in hgis head of how foolish he is to make an approach begins...

So where did James go wrong? Firstly, he waited way too long to deliver his line. The 20 seconds he waited to make an approach gave him the opportunity to doubt himself, procrastinate and ultimately cock it all up. He also became unsettled in his body language, standing anxiously and fidgety with gives off a creepy vibe before he's even said anything. Even though the delivery of his line was sub-par, in the end he had defeated himself and doomed his hopeful result before word's even left his mouth.

What James should of done was stand tall, confident with a smile and most of all relaxed. When he saw the girl he should of waited no more than 3 seconds to make an approach. 9 times out of 10 if the girl was open minded and didn't take herself too seriously/was stuck up he would of got a warm response from which he could escalate into conversation.

The reason why James was unable to get a positive result is because of the value he gave to the girl above his own perceived value. James would not of been nervous if he deemed the girl to be of equal or lower value than himself. Had she been familiar with him as his sisters attractive girl friends he is comfortable with he would of been relaxed and talking to her would not of been an issue.  It all stems from perceived value and that is what seperates guys who can make a relaxed approach with no added pressure than those who get nervous talking to hot women

Untill next time,

Eros